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Monday, February 13, 2012

I know the horrible truth

Can I just say, "I know the horrible truth".  I need to say it out loud!  I'm afraid I don't want to paint anymore.  I feel like I have painted everything I every wanted to paint. I have nothing else to paint. Finished. It's all done. I keep procrastinating.  I keep finding excuses. I've finished up so many little chores like picking up threads off the floor, and stacking and re-stacking papers and dusting a little and washing stuff that didn't need washing and lining up pins and needles and putting things away and getting things out and EATING stuff I shouldn't be eating and making bread. MAKING BREAD. Stitching and sleeping in my chair and feeling haunted by the brushes. My brushes. I can't blog because there is nothing to blog. I haven't painted anything.  I'm finished. Did I tell you that I have already painted everything?  That is how I feel. Now, here is the horrible truth that scares me. I'm OK with it. I guess that's OK. Is it? 


I have a stack of journals here.  This morning I had a thought that maybe if I just picked one and painted something.  Something that I didn't want to paint. But I've already painted everything. I'm finished. Maybe the Gut art journal right there on top would be a start.  Because I have to get this horrible truth out of my gut. Don't I?

44 comments:

  1. Its ok...don't paint. Do some thing else. Paint backgrounds and journal your thoughts, collage...write it out!

    Love to you in this transition!

    -Gypsy

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  2. Oh NO! You are too talented to NOT paint!!! If you decide to take a "hiatus" I'll bet it won't be long before you start again. You know what they say about absence......

    I've been gone for a month but the DVD I ordered from you is waiting for me when I get home. Hope it won't be the last one I buy from you!!!!

    Have FUN whatever you do!!!!!

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  3. Ahhhhhhh! so for you come words of wisdom from this old gal.
    Been there, felt that way and stepped back from it all,for more then a year.
    I returned because I wanted to,not need but I wanted to create again.
    AND I was better then ever,different but better. If I live long enough I just might do that again. Once you are an artist the need to create is there, always. It might go on vacation,it may hide but it will never leave! So take a break,walk away. Nothing will be lost,maybe something gained. Life is short,enjoy it. You are you and that will never change.
    Hugs, Amy Jo

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  4. Sharon--I made art quilts for 10 years and I was very successful at making and selling them--the last year I was making them, it began to feel like a job--one day I woke up and said "I'm not doing this anymore" and I moved on to mixed media stuff. Before the art quilts I built miniature rooms and dollhouses for about 10 years. If you feel like you have painted it all--you may just be ready for a change--but I bet you will always be doing something artistic!! Don't worry--you'll figure it out and in the meantime read magazines and books and eat bon bons and bake bread-whatever floats your boat!!

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  5. I definitely know I haven't painted everything there is to paint BUT there are time the muse takes a nap. There are times the mojo goes on a hiatus. There are times when the brushes take a holiday and the paint goes along for the ride. There are these times and more for all of us. Never say never dear Sharon because we would ALL be very sad to not see something new and wonderful from you in the future.
    xo

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  6. So. Maybe it's time to move on to something else. Either more stitching or jewelry. Maybe you are done with the painting of this type. Maybe you want to try oils again! LOL!! That's not the same as what you're doing now.

    Try a walk around your art room and maybe Michaels or Hobby Lobby and see what inspires you or grabs you or hits that "Ooooh I wanna try that" zone in your heart.

    Or just take a break and make bread and read blogs and see what happens!

    No matter what, don't let it get to you. Just ride through it.This too shall pass.

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  7. Oh Sharon, I'm so sorry you are feeling this way! As others have said maybe you just need a little break time for other things. I sure hope you haven't lost your zest for teaching though because that DVD I ordered is awesome and has helped me to grow tremendously! Did you like making the DVD? Maybe you could make some more?! ; ) Many Hugs to you!!

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  8. I can relate....relate....relate! When I get to that stage, I simply move onto something else like; sewing, painting furniture, making a quilt or baby dress for one of my peeps. If all that fails, I always have the piano to play for awhile or my stack of recipes I want to try! Maybe if you just move on to something else....your muse will return:D We'll be waiting:D

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  9. Your paintings and your classes are amazing...I've praised you to others so MANY times. But...that being said, creativity cannot be forced. I hope you can step back a bit and break this feeling OR that you find another outlet that you enjoy with the same passion. All the best! Misty

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  10. I think your heart might be ready for a change, a challenge. We can not stand in place too long or we have to run harder. Maybe it's time to stand still and listen for awhile.

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  11. ahhh, i had to laugh right out loud. i had stopped painting for about a month. not so strange, i made 3 afghans, a baby blanket and pillows too numerous to count. spun lots of fleece into more yarn and on and on. and now....i am painting up a storm. i think everything goes in waves and it does not matter. and YA SOUND DOGGONE HAPPY! good BALANCE to you sharon, love, wanda

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  12. Familiar to me, I did landscapes and florals for years and did shows and then suddenly I couldn't just couldn't, then that day I found that magazine with you I could again only way different.
    And I can do the other some also.
    I would just let it be, and not say tomorrow I will I would say tomorrow I don't have to unless I need to. I am free a bit free to sit and think and look and read, and maybe a nap and noat plan or answer things, or schedule minutes.
    some day you will see a background or dream about one and maybe you will see leaves and flowers and want to transpose them into a painting.
    Anything you want to do or don't want it seems OK that is what I think abouat my free time. Your loved.

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  13. Sharon,

    In kaizen-Muse coaching which i what I do now, we have a muse called Lull. I'd say that is where you are. Take some time and rest, do those things you are called to. When you feel like painting again, you will. Even if you don't that is ok too. I know that you will be creative in some way and that truly is all that matters.

    Hugs,
    Kate

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  14. Sharon, One must take a REST.
    Creativity for me comes in spurts. YOU my friend have painted and painted.
    I would take a rest, do something else. Often when you do too much of one thing, it is not good.
    I know for me, I keep procrastinating. YOU will come back full force with new ideas.YOU need a vacation. don't feel guilty. Just do what your mind is telling you.
    I will still go ahead and watch your videos and learn more.
    Take time to smell the roses.
    xo

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  15. Sharon, Norah will be back. You're very brave putting this out here. Just know we're all thinking of you and hope you're happy again soon.
    Much love and a big hug.

    Jacky xox

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  16. Art is so much of your life, this change must feel strange. I suspect that some new creative adventure is trying to break through and needs that silence, that space to make itself known to you.

    Keep talking to us, you never know what impact your experience will have on someone else.

    Darla

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  17. Sharon, I am FEELING the same way. Took a week off from work, and have spent 3 days purging, shifting things around, trying to make the studio more user-friendly, and I'm stumped. It's like the muse crawled into a hole and whispered "you are on your own"....But, but, but I made time for you......and the clock ticks...and the funny thing is this very morning I decided to review "painting faces" with dear Sharon, and I'm sure my muse will stir for that. I guess sometimes we can't force that little nudge that pushes us into that wonderful creative state of mind. You are one of my biggest inspirations, and I feel better that you remotely feel like I do sometimes. I know you better than that....I'll be watching for your next 'itch'!!!

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  18. This can mean only one thing. There is something coming on the horizon..something so exciting that you will be bursting at the seams to create it or with it. This is the way of art and life.

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  19. I come across this problem 2 or 3 times a year and happen to be in it right now. I've painted all the flowers and all the trees, I have no more ideas! But my husband always encourages me to get back in that room...your motivation will come back...and it obviously does.

    Good luck with this...my suggestion would be to get yourself a large...I mean large canvas and just start putting color on it with no intentions other then getting it out.

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  20. OMG! Is there some kind of mojo going on? I have been feeling the same way. I want to pack everything up and just read books or watch tv! It is like a switch has gone off and every stroke of paint I put on canvas is just plain boring for me! What are these some kind of cycles some of us are caught up in? Weird!

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  21. You have so much talent to share but if you feel this way follow the feeling and enjoy another creative outlet whether it be gardening, reading, walking, photography art will always be a part of you and waiting. Sending hugs and much love on this transition:O)

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  22. Maybe you've painted everything you want to paint today and tomorrow and next week, but there will be new things when the time is right. Go stitch some pretty somethings or anything else that feels like what you want to do. It doesn't mean you are abandoning your brushes. They will wait for you. And you can still blog about what you are reading, what kind of bread you are baking (yum!) or whatever else you are enjoying in the meantime. We don't love you only for your paintings!

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  23. I don't know what to say other than I just love you Sharon, you are a huge inspiration for me so many! Don't think you have to be doing something, all the time. Just let it rest & see what happens. The pressure we put on ourshelves to keep producing is sometimes so overwelming it puts use in limbo, where we can't move. You will be able to shake it loose when you are good & ready. Just sit, stare and breath into it. Big hugs...

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  24. Well where the heck is Norah? It's all her fault!

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  26. Sharon, I would love for you to take a look at what you inspired me to do-

    http://suppliesoverflowing.blogspot.com/2011/08/lespwa-fe-viv.html

    Thank you. There is no pressure from me to get you going, but I do think of you when I look at this painting.

    jenny

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  27. SHARON- IT'S OK...It's totally ok never to paint again...no long words of wisdom from me....except- do what feels right. :)

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  28. We, I am sure, have all been where you are now.
    I made dolls/figures for over 25 years...one day I said "No More". I never wanted to see another doll mine or anyone's. A few years passed and one day I started making felted figures and telling their story...for six years on my blog...well this was the last year. What I am saying if it comes from the heart it will come.
    Your Heart is not in painting right now. It is OK!!!
    We will miss your paintings...you have given so much of yourself to so many. You are special. Share with us when you feel like it...we will come and listen and chat.
    Best of luck xoxo

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  29. My first thought is BUMMER! �� Yet I know you have to follow your heart. Maybe if you sit with it a while the feeling will pass. (I have my fingers crossed )

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  30. Sharon, I agree with the other artists. I do it too.
    Need a break or whatever you decide...it's OK.
    It's your life, you need to do what YOU want or feel.We all love and support you.
    I backed off of my blog when I moved last year and find it difficult to be regular with it anymore and it's OK.
    But I know this is temporary and you will be back. Go to your cloth side for a while and hang out there, heck! Do whatever makes you happy, it's your life and life is short.
    xoxo suze

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  31. It happens sometimes, that fleeting, awful, sinking truth that we are at the end of a part of our lives, but an end is just another beginning. Your heart is whispering to you that there is more to see, feel and touch but it might not be your paint brushes and they will still be waiting for you if you find the desire to paint once again. I am sure you will.

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  32. A shot story that might ring a bell. I made soap for years, I sold it, used it, gave it away. It was a passion to find the right smell, the best makings, and then they really had to be beautiful. I made packaging, a personal stamp for boxing. Then one day I was done, and I haven't made another bar of soap. But there could come a day when I will, but if I do not thats okay too. You will always do something because you are so creative, and we in blogland will love whatever you do. Hugs, Mary

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  33. I think there must be something in the air. My last blog post was last Wed. and I don't care! Maybe it will pass....

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  34. I haven't felt very creative myself lately...not sure why. It happens. I know it's not permanent. Seasons change. Moods change. Ideas come and go. Love your honesty about it. Kick back and relax for awhile!

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  35. I haven't felt very creative myself lately...not sure why. It happens. I know it's not permanent. Seasons change. Moods change. Ideas come and go. Love your honesty about it. Kick back and relax for awhile!

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  36. I get that way, too. sometimes I think~~I 'hate' this blog. O.K; I'm through! I do other things and then I get inspired to photograph or write (again.) Then, because of my wonderful friends and my family (who count on me) I am compelled to share. It's like being in a relationship and having an "off' day!

    Go for it! (Or not.)
    :-D

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  37. I didn't read through all the posts so I hope I don't repeat someone. I have had those feelings too, not about painting yet but about mosaics. We all change our feelings about things and go in seasons with what we like to do. you are probably about to inbark on something really big in a creative way. Rest your creative mind and don't worry. You are not going to lose your skill. It will all work out Norah.
    laura.

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  38. When this happens to me, I try to paint something in the style of someone else. I choose someone whose style is the opposite of mine and recreate one of my paintings in that style. It works for me every time. Keeps things fresh.

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  39. I go through this about twice a year (ALWAYS right after Artfest and then again sometime during the summer). I deal with it by doing all those other things that I love to do that don't involve paint. Crochet, needle felt, spin, make a new purse for ME, whatever catches my attention for the moment. I don't pressure myself to paint what I am not inspired to paint. I do sometimes look at art that stirs something within me and play around with drawings. I don't know if you've noticed over the past year or two but my art has gone from "pretty girls" to mostly "ugly girls"! That was one of those transitions where I just didn't want to paint another pretty face! Give yourself time, do something fun....it will come back when it's time. We love you, Sharon. xoxo

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  40. An artist as talented as you will always create. But sometimes the well gets dry and you need to fill it up. The universe is giving you a gift of time to go out and soak up everything and anything. Don't waste this time, because when the creative urge strikes, you need to be ready. Have fun!!

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  41. It is alright to go a different direction! Or you could just come teach me to paint! I just watched your morning art videos and just loved them - thanks so much for sharing. Maybe a little trip or vacation will bring back some inspiration?

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  42. Sometimes, you just *need* a break; even a muse deserves a holiday once in a while - what's to feel guilty about? Enjoy the rest. One day, you'll race back into your studio and wonder why you ever left it. I for one will still think you're awesome. xx

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  43. Don't push yourself to pain if the feeling isn't there. I put my paint brushes down 12 years ago. I picked them up again last week. Hopefully your hiatus won't last as long as mine but I do know exactly how you are feeling. Move your talent and creativity in a different direction for now. That may be all you need and one morning you will wake up with that need to paint. Sending you a big hug.

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  44. You're an artist... you won't NOT paint. A break will give you perspective and allow you to refocus. Get back out there and see the world (Italy???), have a glass of wine (I'll come join you), and see what else peaks your interest. The Artist's Way is also a way to figure it out. It's your journey, you don't have to justify or explain it to anyone, but putting our feelings out there make them more real, and we can deal easier with 'real'. Love you Sharon. You've been a huge inspiration in my life. Just keep showing up!

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